Embracing Imperfection

It was Lord Chesterfield who said we should "aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable."

Now why would the second earl of England, a man who obviously did not find perfection in love (he was married three times, not to mention the number of other women he had affairs with) fell so short of the mark of perfection?

Maybe my Google and Wikipedia skills have caught your attention for a moment.

I was talking to my sister the other day, and we were, in short, discussing some songs that we liked, and suddenly, the question popped in my head - or statement? - "Most songs are written about people who got their hearts broken." That may sound like a bit of a jump for you, but I'm sticking with my claim. You could at least acclaim most depressing songs to that title. And then you could reverse the "unbroken" hearts to the songs that are all about the happy side of love. Either way, you're forced to realize that most song-writers have chosen to write about something intimately personal in their lives, including that which knives the heart hardest: brokenness.

This brokenness initiates the conclusion that at one point there was an unbroken heart, built upon a foundation that probably felt perfect at the time being. And to reinforce an overstatement: No one ever promised that life would be easy.

When people build their relationships around a feeling of perfection, their walls are easily crumbled. Expectations are held way too high for people who fall way below that impossible standard. Maybe John Gray was right when he said that love was nothing about perfection, but all about embracing people's imperfections.

Then again, it doesn't take a doctor and author to teach us that. Look at your own relationships, and think about your personal experiences. Every relationship you have is built upon imperfection. Almost sounds bad, doesn't it? But the truth is imperceptible.

I think this insatiable desire to expect perfection from other people is unattainable, just like our favorite earl said. Too often, we expect from other people what we cannot give to others ourselves. So instead of seeking perfection from our imperfect family members, friends, and significant others, let's act a little more like Mr. Chesterfield. Okay, maybe let's think like him more than act ;)

"Aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable; however, they who aim at it, and persevere, will come much nearer it, than those whose laziness and despondency make them give it up as unattainable." ~Lord Chesterfield