Thinks The Wandering Mind At 3 AM . . .

She walks into the room, but chooses not to sit by him. She wants him to wonder. After all, she always sits by him, or makes an attempt to do so. But not today. She walks past him and sits on the other couch. She pulls out her laptop and starts typing. She's typing the very words she's thinking, and she wants him to wonder what she's up to. What is she thinking? She's typing those empty, meaningless words, hoping to strike a tone of wonder and bewilderment in his mind. Only her peripheral vision is on her side. She stares at the screen, but her mind is wishing for his eyes to be looking up, staring at hers. She takes the risk. She glances up only to catch his glimpse for a second. That was awkward. Back to what she was doing. What exactly was she doing, anyway? Trying to get his attention, right? In a divert manner, of course. All she really wanted was for him to walk over and sit by her, and ask her what was going on. And then, of course, she'd have to reply with that completely false line: "I'm fine." She wanted him to press and to break the seal. It wouldn't take much, but she wasn't going to be a shell easily broken. There was so much behind that comment. So much "something" behind that "nothing." He could not be too ignorant to realize this, could he? This was her way of telling him how she felt. Today, there was no other way. It was not a mind game or a trick. She wanted to see if he cared. Well, just a little, that is. She wasn't ready for a night in shining armor to rescue her from a castle. All she wanted to know, all she really wanted was the assurance that he cared.

That, and his willingness to show it.