Just Passing By . . .

This trait - this one trait - I hate. I hate it when I see it in other people. I hate it when I see it in myself. I don't even like using passive verbs, if I'm not too passive to overlook them. Oh, the evils of passivity.

You know what I'm talking about right? For instance, let's take a song. Most people, I assume, like songs because of the lyrics. Because the words speak to them, relate to their situation, or make them feel good. But don't you even listen to music - and even really enjoy it - and not realize a word that was sung? Maybe it's just me. I don't really know. But time to time, I find myself listening to music passively. Sometimes, my mind is filled to the brim with crazy details of my life, or I'm so mentally tired, that my mind checks out, and music sounds great at the time . . . without that concentration factor.

I'll be listening to a song sometimes, and I'll think wow, this is a great song, and then I'll realize that I know about two phrases from the song . . . maybe. Dang, how dumb is that? And other times, I'll find myself overlooking amazing songs, all because I never really listened to the lyrics.

Which reminds me . . . it's all about listening rather than hearing. I know, maybe this point is driven too far into the ground too often, but it really gets me. I think I forget too often to listen instead of hear. Afterall, I believe listening is one of the best qualities that goes overlooked. Anyone can sit there and hear your problems - and then they can tell you all the ways that they would fix them. But what about someone who can listen? Someone who take in everything you're saying, relay the information you gave them, and react in an understanding way that isn't overpowering? I think that's a gift. Imagine what would happen to people's relationships if they chose to listen more often than hear. I think we'd see a big change. But hey, that's just my opinion.

Ya know what makes Teardrops on My Guitar so amazing for every teenage girl out there who tears up every time this song is played on the radio (and let me add, it does tend to get annoying, not to mention, it's overplayed)? That girls can relate to this. When this girl I know first heard the song, she thought nothing of it. Days later, she comes to me saying, "Wow, I had no idea about that song. The words . . . they're great."

But let's get back to the soul of the matter: passivity. This doesn't just happen in music lyrics, people. Take the movies, for instance. Have you ever watched movies with people who seem to never have a clue about what's going on? (And yes, I know, all five of you, I probably drive people crazy when they watch movies with me, too, haha). They stare at the screen, but don't make an effort to engage their minds in what is going on. For the clueless girl, she'll watch any chick flick you put in front of her, but don't you dare put something in front of her that requires thinking. Unless, of course, you enjoy playing 20 questions. As for the clueless guy . . . well, you got me there.

And here's what gets me really bad. School. Or worse, summer school. Talk about not wanting to think! Although I'm typing 90 words a minute, my mind is pretty much across the nation. And then when my assignments come up, I'm lost . . . why? Because I'm passively paying attention. I'm not activating my mind. I guess it's not a crime. But it adds to my case that passivity is a problem.

I think it's so perfect that there are active and passive verbs in English. Did you ever hate learning about them? It never bothered me. Maybe that's because I'm a grammar nerd. But I had this one teacher in high school who had a passive verb limit for a research paper. And if you went over the limit, you had major points deducted. I don't think it was a terrible rule. Annoying? Sure, but not a bad thing. Action verbs make sentences more colorful and powerful, which in turn, improve paragraphs, and in result make a good paper great.

I think passivity can be looked at even further. Ever think about it as a personality trait? You see the people who allow bad things to happen in their lives, yet they choose to not do anything about them, usually for a variety of reasons. And then you see those people who choose to take action - I usually find more respect for these people. Maybe it's because I wish I were more like that. I understand that action should be taken in the right way, at the right time, and only when necessary, but gosh, do I respect someone who won't sit on the sidelines when he knows he can making a difference versus the person who's a quitter, who doesn't believe in himself, who chooses to let his circumstances become more important that what he believes.

Back to the English lesson session for just a moment . . . think about it for a second. A passive verb indicates that the suject is receiving the action - not doing it. It's just a thought, but I think it's deeper when looked at with a more discerning eye. When I move this concept into the lives of people, I get thinking . . . don't you always like the people who seem to get the job done more than the people who have to have everything done for them. I'm pretty much reiterating what I said in the prior paragraph. But overall, I'm going to respect someone who's active versus someone who passively let's life pass him by.

Don't sit around, waiting for life to happen to you. Make your life happen.